Home Care in New Haven CT
Often loved ones who have dementia or Alzheimer's will ask to speak to their parents or other loved ones that have passed away. This can be disturbing for many different reasons but it's complicated to respond. You certainly don't want to make your loved one cry every time she asks about seeing her mother, but what can you do? Here are three different responses that can help.
The Validation Approach
This type of response involves you responding with questions such as, "What do you miss about your mom?" or "What did you and your Dad do when you got to spend time together?" These types of questions take the focus off of locating the person and place it on what your loved one remembers about the person. Often your loved one may be asking for her parents simply because she misses them or because she has other unresolved feelings, such as guilt for not being able to help them more. Validation can help your loved one to be comforted simply by talking about their loved one with you, even if that's not what she initially set out to do.
The Reality-based Approach
Sometimes you may need to be more honest with your loved one, even if it seems painful. For example, if your loved one is determined to see her father because he's sick, you may need to let her know that he's not sick anymore, that he's passed away. This can help to relieve anxiety for your loved one or to remind her that her father or other loved one is no longer in pain. This is often an approach of last resort, especially if you've tried everything else and it hasn't worked for your loved one.
Distracting Your Loved One
Sometimes your loved one may just need something else to focus on. If it's possible, try taking your loved one to another room or even outside to enjoy some time in the fresh air. Try talking to your loved one about other topics, such as other family members or an activity you'll try later in the day. You may find that it's not difficult to steer the conversation in other directions.
Work with your loved one's home care providers to find the combination of responses that seems to work best for your loved one. Then you can work together to keep the responses consistent.
If you or an aging loved one are considering home care in New Haven, CT. Please contact the caring staff at SYNERGY HomeCare East Haven. Call today: (203) 691-5071.