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Is Your Relationship with Your Mom Strained Because You're Her Caregiver?

Caregivers in Wilton, CT - Try these Tips for Improving Your Relationship with Your Elderly Loved One

Caregivers in Wilton, CTMaybe in the beginning, when your mother first had her stroke and it was evident she was going to require some type of home care, volunteering for that job yourself seemed like the right thing to do. You only lived a few miles away and being that she had been there for you for all of your life, you felt that it was your responsibility now to return the favor.

As a family caregiver, you will quickly realize that the responsibilities of this job are tremendous. Depending on what else you have going on in your life, you may have other responsibilities, such as community activities, a job, children, or other things.

Even if you don’t have a job or other direct responsibilities, eventually you may come to realize that your relationship with your mother is getting strained because of the care you are providing for her at home. This is often the direct result of family members wanting their elderly loved ones to be safe and healthy and therefore trying to keep them from overdoing it. At the same time, your aging mother might want to still do a number of activities, visit with friends, play games with them, try new forms of art, or other things, and that can be the beginning of the relationship strain.

There are certainly things every family member can do to help improve relationships around them. February is Relationship Wellness Month and we have put together a few ideas that could help your strained relationship with your mother as a result of being her caregiver.

1. Learn to communicate more effectively.

Communication is essential to any relationship. If the lines of communication are not open or it is more of a one-way street (you’re telling your mother what she can or should do), then that is not the healthy form of communication. Be willing to stop and listen to what she has to say. You may discover things she’s been trying to tell you for some time.

2. Take a break from caregiving 

When it becomes apparent that you and your elderly loved one are at odds more often than you're pleasant to each other, it's time to take a break. See if a trusted neighbor, family friend or other family member can give both of you a break from each other for awhile. Even one day off can give you a chance to collect yourselves, refocus on what's important, and de-stress.

3. Consider a professional home care provider.

Believe it or not, you can hire a professional home care provider to work with your elderly mother for one, two, or more days a week. An experienced caregiver could provide valuable insight into things you might have missed or activities your mother may still be able to do, even if you didn’t think so before.

Having somebody else take care of your mother for a few days a week could provide you an opportunity to focus on the relationship with her, rather than worrying constantly about her health and well-being.

If you or an aging loved one are considering caregivers in Wilton, CT or the surrounding areas, please contact SYNERGY HomeCare of Fairfield, CT at 203-923-8866.

Jay Kiley
Jay Kiley

Jay Kiley has spent well over 30 years providing world class customer service to clients around the world. Whether it was during his career in banking as a senior officer with Fortune 500 companies or working with some of the wealthiest people in the world with the Superyacht Rigging Company he owned with his brother; customer service was and is first and foremost.

As the Regional Developer of SYNERGY HomeCare in Connecticut Kiley again puts the customer’s needs first. Working with the  five SYNERGY HomeCare Connecticut offices, Danbury, Bristol, Stamford, East Haven and Fairfield, which he owns with his wife ,Laurie, he has lead the SYNERGY CareTeam to tremendous growth and continued success. Knowing firsthand how health, aging and memory care issues can take a toll on a family, he is a very hands-on owner. He makes his cell phone available to all clients and their families providing more than just care, Kiley provides solutions to his client’s care needs and peace of mind to their family. 

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