Janice never liked the idea that her younger brother had agreed to be their father’s caregiver. Throughout her life, her brother Tim, who was 8 years younger than her, had always been getting into trouble. He would lie and steal from their parents, he would cheat at school, and since he graduated, he had moved back home more than a dozen times, even well into his thirties.
In truth, he wasn’t a responsible adult and he hadn’t been able to hold down a job for very long. Ever. So Janice had a feeling that he only agreed to be an in-home care provider for their father because he wanted a place to stay for free and to try and get more money out of him.
Janice tried to talk to her father about her concerns, but he assured her that he was in control of the situation. Janice knew from her mother (before she had passed away the previous year) that her father felt guilty about Tim’s situation, as though it was his fault that their son was a drifter and someone without any real responsibility.
Janice was concerned that her father was going to coddle Tim and let him get away with a lot. She didn’t know who to turn to because most of her family lived a long way from her father and they already knew about Tim’s behavior.
For Janice, she decided to do what she could to keep tabs on her father and Tim. She had been granted power of attorney over his finances last year shortly after her mother died (he didn’t want to feel all alone dealing with bills and such). So she made sure that she watched the money.
If a large sum of money was being withdrawn, or ATM withdrawals were taking place every day or every couple of days, she would check with her father. He couldn’t get out and go to the bank by himself, but Tim could certainly take him.
Any time that there was a purchase on his account, she talked to her father. Eventually her father realized that Tim was stealing from him. Fortunately, because Janice was paying attention, he didn’t steal more than $1,000. It could have been much worse, being his father’s caregiver and Janice believes that he would have taken every penny, if given the chance.
Tim was kicked out and while her father was upset, he knew he tried. Tim just wasn’t going to be responsible. If you suspect that a family member could be taken advantage of by their caregiver who is also related to you, talk to them directly. Denial is easy, but eventually the truth will come to light.
If you or an aging loved one are considering a caregiver in Norwalk, CT or the surrounding areas, please contact SYNERGY HomeCare of Stamford, CT at (203) 340-0652.